All the Lovers in the Night

Haven’t you always done your best with whatever you were up against? Haven’t you given it your all, whatever came your way? Unfortunately, no. That’s not how things had been for me. I had faked it the whole way. In all those years of doing whatever I was told to do, I had convinced myself that I was doing something consequential, in order to make excuses for myself, as I was doing right now, and perpetually dismissed the fact that I’d done nothing with my life, glossing over it all. I was so scared of being hurt that I’d done nothing. I was so scared of failing, of being hurt, that I chose nothing. I did nothing.

It made my head sway, and my breath grew deeper as my legs climbed up that evanescent staircase, each step a sheet of light. They would shimmer to life the second my sole made contact, then fizzle into stardust when I lifted my foot, only to be reborn as yet another step, gently showing me the way.

I felt as though now that the heat and the sun had abated, the edges of everything around me had blurred. And while I could still clearly hear the sound of my own heart, it sounded strange to me, as if it wasn’t coming from inside, but from some other place altogether.

There’s no way you could approach everything in life with the same attitude, because that’d be total nonsense.

“When it comes to love, the only weapon that we’ve got is our emotions, right? So what can you do when your foundation’s all messed up? If that’s the state you’re in, there’s no way you can ever get serious with anybody.”

what if my whole life was just a quote from something else, only I never realized it?

Doesn’t that wear you down a little? To keep looking for something you’ve decided is definitely there, when you can’t really say for sure?

When we see something, the reason we can see it is because it’s being hit with light.

We can only see light when it reflects off something

“Basically, the light of the sun isn’t a single color. It’s made up of an infinite range of colors.”

“Infinite?”