Heaven

Just seeing you, though, I feel, I dunno, happamine.”

Why people don’t print money when they’re broke.

I couldn’t stop crying. My tears fell on Kojima’s face, mixing with her tears and the rain. But I wasn’t crying because I was sad. I guess I was crying because we had nowhere else to go, no choice but to go on living in this world. Crying because we had no other world to choose, and crying at everything before us, everything around us.

. There’s meaning in overcoming pain and suffering. That’s right, Momose said in a deep voice, and you’ve got to drag everybody into it.

There’s meaning in overcoming pain and suffering.

We know right from wrong. But we need to see, we need proof that all our pain and suffering will be rewarded. I told you this isn’t just about us anymore. That’s why your eye is the way it is, and why I have my signs. That’s why we met. Events always have meaning, Kojima said.

That’s what I was saying. It’s all the same. You, me, we’re all free to interpret the world however we want. We see the world differently. It’s that simple. That’s why you need to be strong. You have to overpower people so they can’t come at you with their thoughts or rules or values.

If anything has meaning, everything does. And if nothing has meaning, nothing does.

Hey Kojima, I said, what makes you think this matters? Of course it matters, she said. We’re not giving in. We’re letting it happen. And we know what’s right. Our will is intact. These guys have so much more to learn. We talked about this. They’ll learn someday. Kojima’s laughter rang in my ears. Her smile made me miss the way things used to be. Weakness matters, she said. It has real meaning. I was silent, focused on her voice. But know what, she said, if weakness matters, then so does strength.

“Nobody does. They either look at me like I’m a freak or turn away. I’m used to that. And you guys can think whatever you want, but I just wish you would leave me alone . . . it’s not like I chose to be born this way. You didn’t choose to be born with normal eyes, either. In that way, we’re the same, you and me. I can’t help it that you think I’m disgusting. And that’s fine. Still, that doesn’t mean you have a right to hurt me, or anybody else.”