Jerome Klapka Jerome

rummaged the things up into much the same state that they must have been before the world was created, and when chaos reigned

Montmorency was in it all, of course. Montmorency's ambition in life, is to get in the way and be sworn at. If he can squirm in anywhere where he particularly is not wanted, and be a perfect nuisance, and make people mad, and have things thrown at his head, then he feels his day has not been wasted

To get somebody to stumble over him, and curse him steadily for an hour, is his highest aim and object

he would never smile again

There is nothing does irritate me more than seeing other people sitting about doing nothing when I'm working

the sight of another man asleep in bed when I am up, maddens

Get up, you fat-headed chunk

tooth-brush of mine will be the death of

weren't going to unpack that bag again for him, nor for anyone like him

what cared we for human suffering