'So Katy Wix has written this book of comic monologues and I may have to steal some of them. Although written for the female voice, I dare say they would stand up very well if you were a gentleman and changed the odd word or two. Here you have a book filled with brilliant characters and much funny. Each piece is bubbling with the quirky genius that makes Miss Wix one of the funniest performers / writers around.
If I was ever called to audition, which I am not often despite being largely available and willing to try my hand at most things, I would be most grateful to Miss Wix for this fantastic collection. However most likely I shall keep it by my bed to dip into for laughs.
It is a very good read.
Well done Miss Wix.'
There are many monologues books on the market but very few provide rich material for comedy. This collection from up and coming comedian & actress Katy Wix plugs that gap and provides female performers with the kind of wonderfully warm and interesting characters that they need – and deserve.
A comedian and writer, Wix has for the past few years been writing audition speeches for students at drama schools including RADA, LAMDA, Drama Centre and The Royal Welsh College of Music and Drama. A book of contemporary comedy monologues does not exist for today's actor or indeed a book comprising solely of showcase speeches. This is a collection of very funny and original audition speeches filling a significant gap in the market: made up of monologues for various age ranges, each with a running time of two to three minutes. The brevity in length makes these ideal for auditions or showcases and the variety in age and style encompasses different comedic approaches; from the very quirky to the more traditional – perfect for every type of performer.
A DIFFICULT YEAR A woman enters with a pineapple. Has everyone got a piece of paper!? Yes?! Great! WHOOPPIE! (She does a massive laugh.) Don’t mind me! HAHAH. Oh, God – she’s off on one – what’s she making us do now!? But seriously, has everyone had a look at the pineapple? Said the actress to the bishop?! (Another big laugh!) I’ve drunk on an empty stomach – sorry everyone – what am I like!? (Another laugh.) No, tell me. I want know – what AM I like, hahah! Has everyone had a look at the pineapple?! I won’t ask again and has everyone got a pen?! Ok, Ok, come on you lot – it’s either this or I start singing… (She bursts into over-the-top opera and then laughs again.) HAHAH! I told you! Don’t! Shut up! I’ve had a drop…absolute chaos. Don’t! Right, no, right, we’re all gonna go round one at a time and you’ve gotta write down, listen, we’re gonna write down how many leaves you think are on the pineapple, no, listen, now come on, now…how many leaves are on the pineapple. Then I’ll go away and count them and then whoever’s closest is the winner. Everyone, yeah? WHOOOPIE! Hahaha. And that’s it, that’s the pineapple game! And the winner…what does the winner get … (Sung.) The WINNER TAKES IT ALL. Hahahh! I love musicals! (American agent voice.)… “Kid – you got talent, make sure you don’t waste it”. Hahah. The winner…I haven’t thought what the winner gets! I’ve got a sofa that wants chucking-you can have that…how about an extra portion of trifle and a feel of my arse. HAHAH. Right, COME ON EVERYONE – LET’S PLAY THE PINEAPPLE GAME! WOOOHOOOO! HAHHA, WHY IS MY HAND EMPTY – SOMEONE PASS ME A GLASS – WATCH OUT EVERYONE – …HAHAHA The laughter slowly dies down and there is for the first time a palpable silence. The silence is slowly filled with a wimper, an awkward, embarrassed, shameful sob then a couple of big sobs. Pause. Oh God I’m so unhappy… She cries. She slowly slowly pulls herself together. Her guests look on horrified. She clears her throat and composes herself. I’m sorry about that everyone. I do apologise. It’s been a bit of a difficult year I’m afraid… Pause. Right! She starts counting the pineapple leaves. One…two…three…four…five….six….seven… eight…nine…ten…eleven…twelve…thirteen… fourteen… Come on everyone!