I Am Zlatan

The main thing I remember is Leo Beenhakker. He leaned forward and said, “If you fuck with me I’ll fuck you two times back,” and – well, that made an impression on me.

I got really thin, and I was probably worn out. I hadn’t had a holiday. I’d done two pre-seasons in the space of six months, and as for food, well, what do you think? I ate junk.

Antonio De Falchi, a young Roma supporter, travelled to Milan to watch Roma's game against Milan. His mother was worried: "Don't wear any red or yellow. Don't show that your a Roma supporter." And the guy obeyed,
He dressed anonymously. He could be a kid from any club, but when one of Milan's hardcore supporters came up to him asking for a smoke, he was revealed immediately by his accent, and it was like "Are you a Roma supporter, you fuck?" and then he was surrounded. He was kicked and beaten to death. It was a terrible tragedy and before our game there was a tifo for him.

But we decided to go out and party at a night club named Cavalli.
Helena also came. We sat quietly in a corner with Gattuso while Pirlo and Ambrosini and everyone were partying like crazy. It was such a relief everywhere, a crazy joy, and we didn’t get home until four in the morning.

It was scary in some ways, and that feeling that everything you had inside of you needed to get out and I was glad I had Thierry Henry. He understood me, and we were having laughs, like I said. That eased the pressure, and somehow I started not caring about the whole thing

But then they strangle themselves, and ruin things for the team. Absolutely, Guardiola had been a huge success. The club had won a lot under him. I have to applaud that, and a victory is a victory.
But now afterwards I think it came at a price. The price was that the big personalities were chased away.
It wasn't a coincidence that the guy had problems with guys like Ronaldhino, Deco, Eto'o, Henry and me.

It was a tight race in the top. Marco Di Vaio in Bologna and Diego Milito in Genoa were side by side, and of course, it wasn't Mourinho's business. He was coaching the team. But he stepped forward in the locker room and said:
"Now we are going to make sure Ibra becomes the top scorer too” and it became a thing. Everyone would help me. Everyone said it.
But Balotelli, the fucker; in one of the last games he got the ball in the box and I came running. I was alone, clear in front of goal. I had the perfect chance. But Balotelli kept on dribbling and I looked at him: What the fuck are you doing? Weren't you going to help me? I was pissed off, but sure, the guy was young. And he scored. I couldn't start yelling at him then. But I was pissed, our whole bench was pissed off: Fuck running around there scoring when Zlatan has the perfect opportunity, and I thought, if that's the way it is, fuck the Capocannoniere. Thanks, Balotelli. But I got over it.

“What’s up? What do you have going for me?” Of course, Anders wanted the best for me. He checked it out and came back. But what did he have to show?
“Southampton is interested”, he said.
“What the fuck! Southampton! Is that my level?”
Southampton!

Capello had substituted Del Piero to give me a place, and no one had benched Del Piero in ten years’

What does it matter who we eat lunch with? Believe me, it mattered. If you don’t stick together outside the pitch you’ll notice it in the game.