Ever Yours: The Essential Letters

You must write to me in particular about what kind of paintings you see and what you find beautiful

When a rough man blossoms — it’s indeed a beautiful sight — but HE has had to endure an awful lot of cold winters before then — more than even the later sympathizers know.

It really bothers me that I have so little success with people in general, I’m very concerned about this

I almost regret starting to paint again, for if I can’t make any progress I would rather I had given it up.

since usually they’re no longer with us when their work is publicly recognized

Once people are so tied to each other, the bond is sacred and one thinks of the words ‘if I did not have you for ever, I would rather not have you’

In a sense I’m glad that I’ve never learned how to paint. Probably then I would have LEARNED to ignore effects like this.

What am I in the eyes of most people? A nonentity or an oddity or a disagreeable person — someone who has and will have no position in society, in short a little lower than the lowest.
Very well — assuming that everything is indeed like that, then through my work I’d like to show what there is in the heart of such an oddity, such a nobody.

don’t enjoy company, and dealing with people, talking to them, is often painful and difficult for me.

Look, if I must die in due course in one way or another, fine, what would there be to keep me alive? Wouldn’t it be the thought of love